Sometimes, even with people you care about, there is not that intimate friendship right away.
The "click" moment happens at a different time for all of us.
Tonight was the click moment for me and Angela, and I am most pleased by this.
It is not that I did not care, or that she did not, but we never had the same relationship as I had with a couple of the others in the Sisterhood of the Travelling Teacup... but like all things, different people drift in on their own time, and the teacup circle changes for the better with each addition, different aspects of each adding her own unique flavour and tradition.
Truly it is a living entity, and tonight... tonight Ang and I clicked to our groove.
Most excellent.
:)
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
First, an update... and renewed hope...
Norm is progressing slowly but surely... this is Kim's update as of today (July 28).
Thank you all for your loving words...
xo
Stevie
"July 28
Well Norman is heading in the right direction. They have taken him off all the drugs that paralyzed him, the sedatives, and the heart meds. He is not fighting the breathing tube and they are giving him some pain meds.
They have removed the new feeding tube in his belly, as the nurse was not confident it was working properly. So they have done an X-ray and are doing a CAT scan tonight to check things out in there. We do not need a repeat of what happened Thurs/Fri. They will decide if it should go back in or not.
So, slowly things are going in the right direction. As for me, I think it's all kind of hit me in the last 24 hrs what is really happening. I will be concentrating on myself this week, so I will apologise up front if I am not as diligent with my updates or as up beat as I have been in the past weeks.
I will be going to see Norman by myself on Wed and that I cannot wait for. To spend some time by ourselves will be good therapy for me if no one else.
Thank you everyone for just being there.
Love and Hugs...Kim"
Thank you all for your loving words...
xo
Stevie
"July 28
Well Norman is heading in the right direction. They have taken him off all the drugs that paralyzed him, the sedatives, and the heart meds. He is not fighting the breathing tube and they are giving him some pain meds.
They have removed the new feeding tube in his belly, as the nurse was not confident it was working properly. So they have done an X-ray and are doing a CAT scan tonight to check things out in there. We do not need a repeat of what happened Thurs/Fri. They will decide if it should go back in or not.
So, slowly things are going in the right direction. As for me, I think it's all kind of hit me in the last 24 hrs what is really happening. I will be concentrating on myself this week, so I will apologise up front if I am not as diligent with my updates or as up beat as I have been in the past weeks.
I will be going to see Norman by myself on Wed and that I cannot wait for. To spend some time by ourselves will be good therapy for me if no one else.
Thank you everyone for just being there.
Love and Hugs...Kim"
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
You are my sunshine...
I love you both to the moon and back.
Thank you for enriching my life as you do.
xo
Saturday, July 12, 2008
It’s all a matter of circuits
My newspaper column this week.
“Stephanie, you changed colour! Nice software!”
That line, originally uttered by robot Number 5 from the 1986 movie Short Circuit, was the bane of my high school existence… and the culprit most likely to utter it, huge grin plastered to his face, was my pal Norm Gagatek.
We were a pretty tight knit group. We were the band geeks, the science wing squad… we were the Columbia Valley Goonies.
But one of our number now needs our support.
On Saturday July 5, Norm had a small stroke and was Stars ambulanced to Foothills Hospital in Calgary. Even though a stroke as small as the one he had is usually undetectable, this one occurred in the brain stem. What was most affected was his wake up function, and for several days he was considered to be in a coma. Also affected is his vision.
His motor functions were not affected, but there are other effects of the stroke for Norm to overcome.
There is, of course, a worst case and best case scenario, but I, and I know many other people, are putting their energy into focusing on the best case scenario which will see Norm home with wake up function and all motor skills intact.
Norm’s wife Kim has been a rock, and even if she did not have so many friends and family members rallying around her, as well as everyone from home offering her support, I believe she would still be as strong and resilient as she is. No small feat when she is also caring for their four-year-old and expecting a teeny Mini-Norm (or Mini-Kim) in early 2009!
As so often seems to happen with our community, people have rallied.
Messages to Kim and Norm on their Facebook support page (Norm Gagatek Support if you are looking for it) and visits from old and not so old friends have I know meant the world to them.
It is hard to say just how long Norm’s recovery will take. But the more positive energy sent his and Kim’s way the better. And if you are in Calgary, or can make a trip in, Kim has said visits from friends are helping immensely. Check with the nursing staff about good visiting hours.
Who has not at some point been the recipient of Norm’s giant heart and will to help out? Few can say they have ever asked something of him and had him say no. I doubt anyone can.
Even last Monday, when at the last minute we needed someone to tow our Canada Day float for the youth centre, it was Norm who came through for us, adding to his already hectic schedule, and doing so with a smile and asking nothing in return. It may sound cliché, but they truly did break the mold after they made our Normy.
I saw him just two days after the stroke. He did not open his eyes or talk, but he squeezed my hand when I made bad jokes, and when I was lippy… a squeeze of the hand might not quite be a snappy comeback, but it go the message across: he was listening and boy when he fully wakes up am I going to hear an earful!
I don’t want to update his progress at this point because as I sit writing this it is Saturday evening, and by Wednesday when you will be reading this, and I am having a visit with him, who knows what leaps and bounds he might have made.
Suffice to say, each day brings new hope, new achievements, and new strength to meet the challenges ahead.
And for possibly the first time ever, I am hoping to hear those familiar words, with the familiar laugh and predictable smirk: Stephanie, you changed colour! Nice software.”
You only get one free one Norm. I expect to hear it soon.
“Stephanie, you changed colour! Nice software!”
That line, originally uttered by robot Number 5 from the 1986 movie Short Circuit, was the bane of my high school existence… and the culprit most likely to utter it, huge grin plastered to his face, was my pal Norm Gagatek.
We were a pretty tight knit group. We were the band geeks, the science wing squad… we were the Columbia Valley Goonies.
But one of our number now needs our support.
On Saturday July 5, Norm had a small stroke and was Stars ambulanced to Foothills Hospital in Calgary. Even though a stroke as small as the one he had is usually undetectable, this one occurred in the brain stem. What was most affected was his wake up function, and for several days he was considered to be in a coma. Also affected is his vision.
His motor functions were not affected, but there are other effects of the stroke for Norm to overcome.
There is, of course, a worst case and best case scenario, but I, and I know many other people, are putting their energy into focusing on the best case scenario which will see Norm home with wake up function and all motor skills intact.
Norm’s wife Kim has been a rock, and even if she did not have so many friends and family members rallying around her, as well as everyone from home offering her support, I believe she would still be as strong and resilient as she is. No small feat when she is also caring for their four-year-old and expecting a teeny Mini-Norm (or Mini-Kim) in early 2009!
As so often seems to happen with our community, people have rallied.
Messages to Kim and Norm on their Facebook support page (Norm Gagatek Support if you are looking for it) and visits from old and not so old friends have I know meant the world to them.
It is hard to say just how long Norm’s recovery will take. But the more positive energy sent his and Kim’s way the better. And if you are in Calgary, or can make a trip in, Kim has said visits from friends are helping immensely. Check with the nursing staff about good visiting hours.
Who has not at some point been the recipient of Norm’s giant heart and will to help out? Few can say they have ever asked something of him and had him say no. I doubt anyone can.
Even last Monday, when at the last minute we needed someone to tow our Canada Day float for the youth centre, it was Norm who came through for us, adding to his already hectic schedule, and doing so with a smile and asking nothing in return. It may sound cliché, but they truly did break the mold after they made our Normy.
I saw him just two days after the stroke. He did not open his eyes or talk, but he squeezed my hand when I made bad jokes, and when I was lippy… a squeeze of the hand might not quite be a snappy comeback, but it go the message across: he was listening and boy when he fully wakes up am I going to hear an earful!
I don’t want to update his progress at this point because as I sit writing this it is Saturday evening, and by Wednesday when you will be reading this, and I am having a visit with him, who knows what leaps and bounds he might have made.
Suffice to say, each day brings new hope, new achievements, and new strength to meet the challenges ahead.
And for possibly the first time ever, I am hoping to hear those familiar words, with the familiar laugh and predictable smirk: Stephanie, you changed colour! Nice software.”
You only get one free one Norm. I expect to hear it soon.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
My friend Norm.
My dear childhood friend Norm had a stroke last Saturday. It was very small, and had it been anywhere else in his head it would have been but a twinge.
But it was not anywhere else, it was at the top of his brain stem in his hippocampus.
That is a very very bad place to have a stroke. And a one in a million shot.
Every day he improves a little, but this will be a hell of a battle. But if anyone can do it, it is my friend Norm.
Please send good thoughts his way. He has a wife who is pregnant and a son who is four.
And he is wonderful.
There is a support page for him on facebook. It is called Norm Gagatek Support.
If you feel like stopping by it.
Love to all, loving you all, believing in every one of you.
xo
Stevie
But it was not anywhere else, it was at the top of his brain stem in his hippocampus.
That is a very very bad place to have a stroke. And a one in a million shot.
Every day he improves a little, but this will be a hell of a battle. But if anyone can do it, it is my friend Norm.
Please send good thoughts his way. He has a wife who is pregnant and a son who is four.
And he is wonderful.
There is a support page for him on facebook. It is called Norm Gagatek Support.
If you feel like stopping by it.
Love to all, loving you all, believing in every one of you.
xo
Stevie
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
see...
so wrapped in a steel gauze of our own myopic making
we rail against life and all its injustices
why me... how come... not fair... wah wah...
negative negative... and two negatives a positive most certainly do not make
then something happens outside your little bubble of Id
you see true trials
you see true struggle
you see true strength and grace under circumstances that would bring most to their knees
and you do not hear why me... how come... not fair...
you hear instead I am holding up well,
we will get through this
you hear laughter through pain,
strength when it would seem none could be found.
and you look at yourself with no small shame, and cut away the gauze, stop whining and complaining
breathe deep and count blessings
push away the negative and forge forward for what counts
and stand strong to help the ones who need you.
Get better Norm... you are strong... we are waiting for you.
xo
we rail against life and all its injustices
why me... how come... not fair... wah wah...
negative negative... and two negatives a positive most certainly do not make
then something happens outside your little bubble of Id
you see true trials
you see true struggle
you see true strength and grace under circumstances that would bring most to their knees
and you do not hear why me... how come... not fair...
you hear instead I am holding up well,
we will get through this
you hear laughter through pain,
strength when it would seem none could be found.
and you look at yourself with no small shame, and cut away the gauze, stop whining and complaining
breathe deep and count blessings
push away the negative and forge forward for what counts
and stand strong to help the ones who need you.
Get better Norm... you are strong... we are waiting for you.
xo
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