Sitting, drinking coffee, just sort of spending time this
morning. Feeling time-wealthy enough to waste it in fact. That is a rarity! I
have decided I am taking this weekend to do what I want. Period.
It is has been… odd lately, the past couple of years. I have
not written much on my cherished old blog, in large part because so much of
what is going on in my life just now is not really up for publishing. At least
not just now.
I feel like a fraud. I tell everyone things are great, all
is well, I am fine.
And in truth, I am fine, but not because all is well, rather
in spite of it not being all well. I feel a bit of the old British backbone I
must have inherited from my maternal grandmother kicking in.
Because how else can I let it be, but fine?
I am not battling a dread disease or anything like that.
Things are just not… well. But that is ok.
I know from experience that they will be again.
It’s funny. I pop onto Facebook, and as I scroll the number
of people that feel fit to go public with all and any issues going on in their
life, large or small, sort of astonishes me. Each to their own, I suppose. But
I had no idea that I was so… is prudish the right word? Reticent perhaps?
Is it a desperate need for attention those posters crave, or
the desire to show people how strong one is despite “all these awful things?”
Or maybe I am just more private that I realized. Perhaps, in
this day and age of oversharing, I feel more protective about my personal life.
I don’t mind baring my soul now and then, to a smaller
audience. And one day I will be more specific about what is currently going on.
One day. Not today.
I will say I am right sick of winter! We have this
greenhouse, you understand. And a rather large garden. As you can see from my
previous post, I have ordered seeds and it appears I have become a bit of an
addict.
Who would have thought the teenage girl who hated having to
pull weeds for her parents in the garden would one day long to be out there,
doing just that and tending to the seedlings with glee? Which makes me wonder,
how are Ian’s oak trees growing? Did Little John stay strong? My, that was a
long time ago.
Ok then. Coffee cup is empty. Must go refill.
Hello to one and all, will pop by and have a keek at what
you have been up to lately.
Sending love and huddles,
Stevie
6 comments:
Little John did indeed stay strong, and is flourishing in my Big Sister's garden in Dumfries, Scotland. About 6 more little oaks have since been circulated amongst various nephews / nieces.
Since then I have also heard that the Forestry Commission who take care of Sherwood, are willing to take back any small oaks / saplings that people have grown from acorns. So I shall continue to propagate the world in that manner. *In my own garden is a small oak tree now rather too large to risk uplifting, so as and when I move house (something I tried to do recently, but the seller couldn't move out), I shall leave it whosoever follows me.
Re your blog post, I am in total agreement. I don't put stuff on the 'net that's personal. Everyone has their ups and downs and their story to tell, and I don't criticize anyone who feels the need to express themselves in that way. I'm sure it can be very therapeutic, but it's just not for me.
Cheers for now from a rather chilly night in Nottingham. But Spring is on the way.
It is on the way! We will be firing up the wood burner in a couple of weeks to start the seedlings in the greenhouse, and I think I might just move in entirely at that point. Right now when I go in, it is a balmy 70 degrees and that wonderful, humid, greenhouse smell almost makes me drunk.
Tony and I have joked about putting a hot tub in the greenhouse... and if and when we expand or build a new one, I think that needs to be less of a joke and more of a reality. :)
Hi Stevie,
So nice that you took the time to respond over on my blog. I can totally understand your need to keep things private, and hope that whatever you are going through will find a happy or contented ending soon. It's all a journey and process, ism't it, and we all need to muddle through it as best as we can.
I'm delighted to see you writing here again, as I largely closed up my FB tightly to use it differently. I hope you'll be back here giving us glimpses of how things are going. Wish you all the best. xx
Hi Stevie, I love it that you are posting again, if only rarely. I am with you about going public about private things. I think I have got quite practiced in the art of saying a lot without really saying anything! My blog is still my favourite space but even there I rarely mention private issues...just my way. Others use their blogs and Facebook for that purpose and that's fine...good even. Just not for me and it seems not for you too. I really hope to see you here again soon, dear Stevie. I love your musings! Xxx
Anne-Marie, blogging truly is a totally different feel, isn't it? Facebook is so filled with memes and frustrating posts. Don't get me wrong, I still scroll through with my morning coffee, try to filter out the detritus and focus on what my family and friends are up to. And I do post things quite often. But it is sort of one off stuff. Here feel more... substancy, if I may make up words on a whim. :)
Vally I have missed all of you! I did a quick zip around all the bloggers on my list, and found only a few are still actively blogging, but it is nice to know I can come back and feel welcome! Kind of like the progidal blogger. ;)
Blogging feels much less restrictive in terms of word usage; Twitter and FB to me seem to be bout quick, surfacy (speaking of invented words) posts. I had a terrible experience with a ghost on FB and reduced my list to almost nothing, which has turned out to be the perfect tonic for having manageable and meaningful interactions there. Like Val, I do hope you'll be back here posting as I always enjoyed reading what you were up to and do miss your writing. xx
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